Soup Strainers

I spent most of yesterday afternoon working on a hard-hitting post that I think you'll really enjoy, but I missed the editorial deadline so it will have to wait until next week.  Instead, please enjoy one of the funniest things I've read in a long time:  Major League Baseball's All Porn Mustache Team.  Here are a couple of the players listed and a brief description:

Dickie Thon, Shortstop:  Let me get this straight… his first name is Dickie, and he has that mustache to boot!  Perfect.  Speaking of boots, Thon muffed his fair share of ground balls as a journeyman middle infielder, but on this squad his mustache is an all-star.

Paul Assenmacher, Relief Pitcher:  The Ass Maker is one tough customer. Looking at that mustache, this is one lefty you don’t want to see coming out of the pen. He also was in the majors for four or five hundred years. Near the end of his career, a tired and weary Ass Man sported his ‘someone please kill me now’ mojo while toeing the rubber for the Tribe.

See also: The NBA's All-Ugly Team

{via Little Toy Robot}