We're a little over two week's from the hotly anticipated release of Madonna's new album. Too bad I can't remember what it's called nor do I care to look it up, but be sure that I'm preparing something quite exciting to celebrate.
Meanwhile, though I don't usually care for a thing that comes out of the surgically re-restructured lips of Sharon Osbourne, how could I not report on this bit of Madge bashing:
"One day you're in f***ing gun gear, then you're in horsing gear, then you dress like a f***ing dyke, then you dress like a hooker, then you're in a flowery dress reading kids' poetry looking like a f***ing librarian - then you're back looking like an old hooker again."
Her rant continued: "For f**k's sake, who are you? At that age, you should know who you are, what bloody religion you are and what you represent.
"You can't be all things to everyone and true to yourself. I don't care who you are." Mocking Madonna's country house image and lesbian kiss with Britney Spears in a pop video, Sharon spat: "You can't one day be in Horse And Hound and the next in Dyke Weekly."
Sharon, married to rocker Ozzy, said Madge had no business writing "silly" kids' books - and acting prim by not letting her kids watch TV.
She went on: "Oh that's f***ing ridiculous, crap, f*** off - what a load of b*****ks!" The rock boss, recently voted Most Popular Expert at the National TV Awards, hissed: "And writing those painful silly books and reading them to your kids! If my mum came to me with a book like that I'd say, 'F***ing stick it up your a***'. F***ing English Roses - b*****ks."